Closure
by x.imagine.x
Summary: Sam and Marlo's thoughts on Sam's sudden sharing. Prompted by the look on his face as he watched Andy and Nick walk away and the look on hers after he told her about the tool sheds. Considered a tragedy because I wrote it to help myself move on from McSwarek...for now... (that's the only thing tragic about it, I swear. No one dies or anything)


**A/N: Ok, so I'm starting to convert to a temporary McCollins fan. Just until McSwarek come to their senses. Besides, the time apart for McSwarek to grow will be good for them. This way they'll be better when they reunite! To this end, I figured I'd give myself a little bit of temporary closure on that front.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Rookie Blue**

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**Closure**

_Marlo_

He's ruined her perfect day. She thought they had an agreement, but now he's telling her about his childhood and removing the emotional distance she needs to stop herself from feeling guilty. If he's opening up to her, how can she justify keeping her disorder a secret? He's finally putting in an honest effort to deepen their relationship, but she can't come clean this far in. He'll be livid that she's kept it this long, not to mention it would put him in an incredibly difficult situation.

But there's that part of her that's secretly glad he's finally letting her in. Despite her desire for the distance, that little voice in her head is telling her that it's a good thing he's closing it. She's lived isolated long enough. She wants someone to know and accept her, but she's afraid Sam won't turn out to be that guy. She's afraid he'll turn and run at the first sign of trouble. After all, she's heard the talk around the station. She's gathered from the whispers that Sam Swarek doesn't handle difficult very well. It's what drew her to him in the first place. She doesn't want someone who wants to pry into her every secret, and Sam respects her privacy. Now, though, she's worried that's going to change.

She almost laughs as she remembers her doubts of this morning, when she saw the smoothie cup in her boyfriend's hand matched the one in his ex-girlfriend's. She's not an idiot; she's noticed the lingering _something_ between him and McNally. She felt him pull away even more than the arm's length he was at when she first came back. It seems like a different world, her imagination running just a bit wild with thoughts of him ditching her for the ex he clearly still has feelings for. She's been waiting for that particular shoe to drop for a while now, but perhaps tonight means it won't. A very large part of her is relieved, but there's a small bit of her that's terrified. If he's letting McNally go, that means he's finally going all in with her, and that means the secrets she holds can't really be secrets much longer. It's only a matter of time before this all disintegrates around her.

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_Sam_

His mother once told him it's not over until the last one moves on. As he watches her walking away with Collins, he realizes that she's gone. Even though they've been broken up for over ten months now, he's finally realizing that it's truly over. Whether she realizes it or not, she's moved on. He can't recall them ever laughing like she and Collins do as he pulls her into a good-natured headlock. He's noticed they came back even closer than they were when they left, and he's seen the look in the man's eyes as he watches her. It's the same look he's sure he has, even if it's wrong.

Her comments from this morning ring in his head as the two wrestle through the door, still laughing. This morning, he questioned whether it was actually over when she reached out her drink to him and he took it without thinking, almost like they were still together. It was such a natural, familiar thing that neither of them thought better of it and he let himself slip and basically tell her she was the only one who knew him. Her inability to agree after all the time they'd known each other shook him. He knows communication isn't his strong suit, but he's just now realizing how bad the problem is. The one person he wants to know him isn't sure she does. His inability to let her in tore them apart, and now she knows someone else the way he wants her to know him. And who does he have to know him, then?

The door closes behind Andy and Collins, and with it he feels something shift in him. It's not over until the last one moves on. Clearly, she has. She's gotten her closure and now it's time for him to finally get his. He's been seeing Marlo for long enough to know they shouldn't still be at the preliminary stages. He wants someone to know him, and he needs to face the fact that Andy isn't that person anymore. So when he and Marlo have the same conversation for what feels like the thousandth time, he finally makes a decision. He doesn't want emotional distance anymore. It's time for someone to know the real him, not just the Sam on the surface. It's time to let someone in, even if that someone isn't Andy. They've both moved on now. It's over.

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**A/N: Ok, pretty short, but I just needed to be selfish and give myself some temporary closure. I'm still sure they'll be back together, but perhaps all this Marlo business will help Sam get better at the whole communication and feelings thing so they will be better than ever when they get back together!**


End file.
